Wedding Anniversary

This week we celebrated 16th years of a most marvellous marriage.

I dug out the wedding photos and posted a few on facebook, managing to seriously embarass several people who were there at the time and I've hooked up with on facebook!

Here are two of us from that beautiful day:

We look shockingly young!

To prove how much we have changed, here's a similar pose taken on our anniversary:

Even allowing for the poor quality photo, squashed noses, and the fact that Josh took the picture, I think we are looking a bit the worse for wear :0)

We had a nice day though. A friend from church took me shopping (as we didn't have a car at the time - see next item!), then I came back and packed some snacks to take to the Bromley home ed regular meeting. Roarke met us there half way through and we took the boys to McDonalds for a change. In the evening Mum came over to baby sit Jonathan and William and we got a lift to Bromley so that Josh and Samuel could go to Baseline. It was Samuel's first time and he was nervous and excited. The pastor and the youth leaders kept an eye out for him though and he had a great time.

Whilst they were there (3 hours) Roarke and I went for a tapas meal in Bromley, then onto a pub. We both felt very old watching the goings on in the pub! Actually some of it was shocking, to see that the stuff on the news about binge culture, and girls in particular, is totally real.

Neither Roarke nor I were saints in our teens (he became a Christian in his early twenties, and I calmed down around then too) and I certainly had my fair share of outrageous behaviour, but still this just felt different. Not nice.

Anyway, praise God that through being part of BCC, our lads have the opportunity to be involved in Baseline, and through home education too they are able to have a much more positive teen experience than I fear many of their schooled peers are able to.

I'm in the process of sorting out our new, revamped family website. The old one was very popular, especially the gluten free recipes, so its well overdue for me to get another one up (after loosing the free hosting we used to have for it). That's in my spare time ;0)

We spent the afternoon today in the garden clearing up and getting it ready for autumn. Now we've finally got the housing benefit sorted I think we both feel more that this is home - rather than expecting to be thrown out any minute - which is why we've both felt the need to attack the garden. I dug up the strawberry plants to clear out the bindweed coming under from next door, and took the opportunity to split up lots of new plants before replanting. I also got the chance to replant the crocosmia. Roarke took out two shrubs that were in the way, and we moved a tea rose too that had been covered by the shrubs and was looking very sorry for itself.

All the time a small rodent was runny around that appears to be a mouse that lives in the other neighbour's shed :0(

Roarke is already starting to go into hibernation mode; he's not a winter person and as soon as it starts getting dark of an evening, and cool, he starts to struggle.

Time to dig out all the soup recipes....

This week has been a rollercoaster week. The car broke down on Monday night and we went from thinking it was a small thing to fix it, to being told the car was a right off as it would cost more to fix than it was worth (and than we could afford) to the garage ringing us back saying it was a "miracle" but they'd found some tiny thing that was causing it all and had fixed it for £80! God definately had it all in Hand.

Next week our group is planning a Not Back to School Picnic along with more than 30 other groups across the country, as part of an effort to raise the positive profile of home education. The deadline for the written submissions to the Select Committee Inquiry is also approaching so I've got to get around to sorting my personal submission.

The phone has been very busy with new home ed enquiries, mainly from people who have not been able to get their child into the school that they want and so they are needing to home educate whilst going through the appeal process and/or waiting for a place to come up.

Flame On!

Roarke had to send a Director a photo of him fire breathing, for consideration for a part.

Husband, father, home educator, business man, Trustee of Education Otherwise, Actor, professional speaker, course leader for dyslexic kids .... and fire breather!

Rollercoaster Week

Phew, what a week!

The BBC London piece turned out ok, which was a relief. Janey did fab in the evening.

Vanessa Feltz - that was scary. I was soooo nervous, hopping around the room, running up and down the stairs. But apparently my nerves didn't "show" on the radio ;0)

Then the downer of that Indpendent article... still growling over that.

On a personal note, well, you know about chaos theory? The old butterfly flapping its wings? Well I reckon that the effect of the Hadron Collider being turned on was chaos in our household.

On the day it was turned on, Roarke had an audition to get an agent. I nipped out to the shops hoping to get him an anniversary card (no luck). When I got back he was running around because he'd realised that he'd misread the trains times and was running late.

Because of that, I decided to drive him to the station (about 7 minutes by car). As I was just popping out I didn't bother to change into shoes (can you start to see where this is heading?). Also, as Jonathan has destroyed my mobile, I didn't have a phone - I never leave the house if Jonathan isn't with me without a phone.

Anyhow... just as we were nearly at the station - the car stopped. The accelerator (throttle) cable had snapped! Roarke just looked me and me at him... he had 4 minutes before his train left and I wasn't prepared for him to miss this chance at the audition, so I made him get out the car and run off.

I was now on a main road, in my slippers, no phone, and about 20 minutes walk away from home. All four kids at home with my Mum.

I knocked on some doors until I found someone in (I forgot to mention I was on a hill) further down the hill and asked if I could roll the car back down the hill and into their drive. The elderly man kindly said yes. I then set off home IN MY SLIPPERS. Slippers are not designed for long walks. Let alone running.

By the time I got in I was seriously stressed. I found the breakdown stuff and called the RAC.

Then I realised I had a new problem. I now had to get back to the car to meet the RAC. I couldn't find anyone to give me a lift. I couldn't walk back - partly because of time (they were quick, I have to give them credit for that) and partly because my knee was in agony (old knee problem currently flaring up).

So I had to drive the other car. The other car is also not working properly and can't be driven reliably. I stalled it 4 times on the short drive over!

The RAC couldn't fix the car in the end because of the damage done to some parts when the cable snapped. So he had to tow me home. But first he had to follow me home in the OTHER car, then drive me back to get the 7 seater!

Then Roarke rang to say that although he'd made his train, and the first part of the audition fine, they were now running late. That evening his class for dyslexic children was starting back at Bromley College and so this meant he might not get back (from Surbiton) in time.

Just as he was about the give up and come home, they called him in. Poor guy really didn't feel he gave a good audition as he was so stressed. Still, he did, and he got his train back. I couldn't find anyone to get to the college so the IT guy opened the room and put a sign on the door telling everyone that the tutor was on his way.

In the end he was only 15 minutes late.

He just got everyone settled then the computer system crashed and he had to send them all home! After all that!

The next day was our wedding anniversary. 15 years. And to think we were told it wouldn't last because it was such a whirlwind romance (9 months from strangers, to husband and wife).

No car. So that meant we couldn't go to the home ed picnic we'd planned. Instead mum kindly offered to stay with the boys, including baby, and we nipped over to Bromley (in the other car) to have lunch out.

That evening also we managed a meal out. A bit rushed, trying to get back before Jonathan needed to go to bed, but we managed a few hours together.

The next day was our HE meeting in Bromley. It was really busy! New families, some new to the group only but some new to HE as well. I had to drive the other car over (Josh stayed home as we only have three seatbelts in it) but the car stalled lots on the way over and Samuel and William got very scared, especially when it happened in the middle of a busy cross roads.

As it turned out, more teens than usual were there so someone kindly drove back to get Josh.

When it was time to leave, he got a lift back with someone else. Our car stalled three times, once it was almost 5 minutes before it would start again, and all of us were nervous wrecks by the time we got in!

Today we managed to replace the throttle cable though, so that is a relief, and the other car is booked for a mechanic next week.

Roarke has been playing Sim City with the boys in turn, creating a city with each of them. We seem to have a resurgence of Star Wars interest too, with pc games and all the films going on in a marathan.

I've set up a survey about EO's role with the media - take part if you like even if you aren't an EO member (as long as you are a home educator).

I've got work to catch up on now but I'm not in the mood...

A quick post

Wow, two posts in a week! This is a rare luxury!

Much to my amazement, our daily "must do" 15 minutes of work is continuing. William wrote out some letters, then read some of his ladybird book with Nan. Joshua blogged and emailed.

Samuel conquered long division!

I'm so proud of him. He actually sailed through it and kept saying "why did I find this hard?". I think that he found the explanation on the site very confusing for him (not the site's fault, simply down to his SEN) but having me talking over their talky bit, in language that made more sense to him, it clicked what they meant. He is actually very good at numbers so once he understands, he flies through.

Talking of which, William's maths is amazing! All the maths he does on Education City he gets 100% on, doesn't need help, and often clicks the answers before the programme finishes "speaking" the instructions!

I was able to quite honestly say to Samuel that I had learnt with him; I hated long division at school, as despite being in the top set, I never "got" it and had my own secret way of finding the answers. I reminded Samuel of when he first left school and we sat down to some maths - long division - and I carefully went through it with him, only to find at the end when we looked up the answers, that I was wrong! Today, watching him do this section, I finally got it too!

I can now do long division the "proper" way!

Home ed rocks ;0)

Jonathan yesterday pulled himself upright at the sofa, and has spent all day polishing this skill. He now can't be left for a second, or he is out the door, under the table, turning of the pc, turning ON the video, or trying to untangle the wires by the BT home hub box!

He is also already convinced he can stand without holding on, but instead he's getting very good at falling over!

Last week I spent a memorable (ahem!) 5 hours tidying Samuel and William's room. I've decided to expect much less from them in the way of tidying up. In trying not to do what my mum did (which, it seems with hindsight, was to do too much for us) I think I went the other way and expected too much - especially from two aspies. So now I tidy most of it each night, but leave the bits I know they know how to tidy, and/or are still playing with, for them to do. It seems to be working.

Today I spent 2 hours doing Joshua's. Considering his room is 1/4 the size of theirs, and he was tidying too, that shows that his was AT LEAST as bad as theirs!

I'm really, REALLY missing Roarke. We just don't do being apart. It doesn't work for us AT ALL! Lots of late night texting from under the bedclothes... :0)

Following this thought about histamine and Jonathan, lead me to Salicylate sensitivity - which I've suspected for a while that I have as I tick most of the boxes . Looking forward to discussing all this with the nutritionist.

Meantime, the start of last night was much better with him, with even a gap of 2 3/4 hours at one point, but then I was up from 4.30 sitting up with him, yelling all the time, so it didn't end so good :0(

Well, I won't push my luck by writing much more - just glad to have had a few moments in the day!

Time Out

Roarke and I had some "time out" yesterday! He took my brother to the airport whilst I luxuriated in the peace and quiet of his flat - I didn't even put any music on (though I was tempted, as he has a lot of old CDs that I used to have!) as it was sooo nice to have no background noise whatsoever!

It has been my first total alone time since Dad died, so inevitably I guess I ended up a bit sad, as my own grieving isn't really progressing - I'm always looking out for Mum or the boys and don't have the space to show my own feelings really. I sat in the quiet and allowed myself some time just to miss him.

On a brighter note, when Roarke came back, we walked into Bromley and spent some time window shopping and then had lunch at Druckers whilst watching the world go by (a favourite activity of ours!). We took the chance to "eat gluten" as we didn't have the boys around - sadly (or maybe fortunately) our cake-shop-stop days are over!

In Debenhams I managed to get two replacement lipsticks. Lipstick is the one constant piece of make cup I've always worn and even then one usually lasts me a year, so it is the one thing that I will actually spend money on. We also booked in for me to have a make over (!!!) there in October once the house as sold, as a pick-me-up/late anniversary present..

We pottered back to the flat where, to my husband's frustration (literally, *wink*!) I fell asleep! How sad is that! It was just the peace and quiet, and no one making any demands on me - I suddenly realised how very tired I was. So I grabbed 40 minutes sleep on the sofa in the spare room, whilst Roarke watched tv (poor thing - I think he had other plans...).

We then tried to decide where to go for a meal. Roarke and I don't "do" birthdays, or Christmas, and the only special times for us are Valentines and our anniversary. Our union means so much to us that we see it as something to give regular thanks for, and to celebrate. At Valentines we usually have a meal out, and again on our anniversary. Being "foodies" we like to hunt out places that provide good food. My grandfather always said that nothing was expensive, if you enjoyed it - and conversely that nothing is "cheap" if you enjoy it. In other words, you add the value. So some of the places we've been to over the past 13 years have been ordinary, others very up market. We have had some very memorable meals and always determine not to count the cost wherever we end up.

The highlight so far included our 6th wedding anniversary - on a 3 week camping holiday in France, and having run out of money, we left the boys (Josh was 4 and Samuel 20 months!) with the friends that we were holidaying with and went to Collioure. One of the most beautiful places I've ever been to, we could only find one restaurant with a table - the most expensive one - and had just a main course each with a bottle of wine! It was the only time I've ever had truffles - and I now know why every one raves about them.

Anyway, being in Orpington rather than France yesterday, we surfed the web and came across a website for an Italian Restaurant unknown to us, called Vero. Now, when I worked in London I lived in Italian restaurants, and over the years have bought many genuine italian cookbooks and learned a few secrets. But we usually wouldn't trust a "italian" restaurant, as they all seem to think that serving pizza and pasta makes them italian. However, we were encouraged by the menu, and managed to get the only table they had free for the evening.

Financially, it was expensive - but it was definately worth it (we save up throughout the year for our anniversary!). The food was absolutely delicious and the staff very attentive and friendly.

After the meal we came back here and had the bottle of wine that my brother had kindly left for us. A very enjoyable and truly relaxing day.

This morning we are off to church early as our cell group are on "duty" covering all the jobs today. It is also the day that our family are officially welcomed as members of the church, and afterwards our cell group are all going out for a meal together.

Hubby is home!

My parents visited today. They used to come weekly to help out with the children and/or the chores however, since my father has been ill, they have not been down. Today they visited for the first time in many weeks. Sadly, Mum was also unwell today. She has a recurring problem with her leg that is undiagnosed. Its a cross between phlebitis and an allergic reaction. Very nasty.

So I didn't quite get done today what I had hoped. Still, the duplicate Certificate for the Insurance turned up so the car is now taxed and back on the road!

I also got to go the library with my eldest, which was very pleasant. On the way, we discussed the psychology of shopping - prompted by the revamping of our local Sainsbury's branch. At the library, we took out some books on America. We now have two Flat Travellers staying with us, both from the US, so J suggested that he should find out more about the country as "all I know is from the cartoons".

S actually did more learning today that his brother, and achieved his daily target allowing him to spend time on some computer games (his beloved virtual railroad). I put out an appeal yesterday on the Home Educating Special Needs list for a penpal for the lad, and was touched by the large number of replies. He now has a number of new pals to email which has cheered him up immensely.

My husband is home! Hurray! I picked him up from the station just after seven this evening. It is so good to have him back. Through the years, we have spent so little time apart. In fact, for more than half of the time we have been married we have worked together as well. People often ask us how we can spend so much time together without driving each other mad. I'm afraid I've never really understood the question!

I can't imagine life without him. God brought us together in a very amazing way, and has blessed us mightily. He is the perfect match for me, the missing piece, and more than a soulmate. In these days of divorce, "partnerships", and other less than perfect relationships, I feel so very honoured to have been blessed with such a man.

Yes, we have our ups and downs, and we argue at times, but he is such a God-focussed, called person that I never doubt the security and purpose of our marriage.

I'm so glad he's back (can you tell?!).