End of the week

On Tuesday I had Jonathan all to myself. He was really stuffed up with a cold and is not sleeping well, so Roarke took the other three off to Beaver Water World with the home ed group. They got to see lots of small animals, beavers, and reptiles. Josh did the reptile handling and seemed to enjoy it.

Wednesday was a tough day. In the morning I went for William's diagnosis result, which was ASD. On one part of the questionnaire where 8 was the cut off point for showing that yes the child was on the spectrum, he'd scored 23...

It was a lot to take in even though I was prepared for it and it has caused us to sit and really reevaluate everything. We had a chat with Josh about it and said it might be easier for him to think of William as being the same as Jonathan - that is, toddler behaviour - rather than seeing him as naughty etc. To give Josh his due, and he deserves HUGE credit for this, ever since that conversation he has been spending lots of time with William playing with him and indeed responding to him how he responds to Jonathan. The pay off is huge as William is really happy and it seems to have been less stressful for Josh too.

Straight after the interview I had to drive to Hither Green for my friend's cremation service.

It was never going to be "good" but sadly it was an awful experience. As a Christian I get very uncomfortable at "christian" services for non-Christians. My friend's mother had been religious and I understand he had been baptised as a baby and on that basis his father had arranged a religious funeral. But my mate was an atheist and for his friends sitting in the pews it was so uncomfortable to listen to stuff that we knew he was utterly opposed to. We all expected the lid of the coffin to fly off to be honest and him to sit up and answer back! At one point there was a huge gust of wind and the skies darken and some of us couldn't help looking at each other and winking as we all thought the same thing!

The person taking the service didn't know my friend, and had obviously only spoken a few words with his father - who sadly didn't really know his son either. So there was just one sentence actually about my friend and the rest was just the service in the book.

It was excruciatingly painful, sad, and made me very upset. When we came outside it was obviously that all his mates felt the same. We all agreed that if we'd planned the service it would have been about what our friend wanted - but then I guess funerals are for the living not the dead :0(

Some of us went back to the house to pay our respects then we slipped out and joined the others in the pub. THAT was when it really felt like we were saying goodbye properly. Standing in a pub, insulting each other, playing practical jokes on each other, and sharing funny stories about our mate was the reality of our friendship with him and each other and I felt so much better after I'd been there.

It was great to see some mates I hadn't seen for a LONG time, and reminding me of my dim and distant youth and all the stuff I got up to ;0) The only thing missing was my friend.

The next day I woke feeling awful having obviously come down with one of the many bugs going around. With both Jonathan and I ill I had to cancel a meeting I had with a local LA which was a shame. The only highlight of the day was watching Roarke try on an army uniform for a marketing film he was starring in the next day! Shame I felt too ill to take advantage ;0)

The only boots he had suitable to use for the shoot as part of the uniform where his old work/garden boots, so that meant an evening of spit and polish for me. I didn't mind, as it kind of took me back and made me think of Dad. We used to spend hours together getting ready for parades, and especially for competitions (both Dad and I were British Legion Standard Bearers, I went up to Area level, Dad as far as National). I am extremely good at polishing shoes to service standard!

Roarke took Josh to SAVVY and back for me, as I really wasn't safe to drive as I was so dizzy, and it sounds like Josh had a good time as usual.

Friday was a long day. As well as the usual household stuff like shopping in the morning I also went to London in the afternoon as part of a group from EO going back for a return meeting with Graham Badman. Like I've said elsewhere notes from the meeting won't be out till next week as we all need to compare notes and write something coherent, and between family commitments amongst those of us there, it isn't going to happen quickly. Needless to say the meeting was only noteworthy for me in what we didn't find out.

Roarke was filming all day but we got a chance to relax a little late in the evening once we were both back home, before an early night. Only once in the past fortnight have we gone to bed after Josh! Gosh how old am I?!

Today I did some baking to relax and try to get my head together, making bread and biscuits and then sorting out a nice roast for the evening. I noted that the free range chicken said it served 3-4 and yet we managed generous portions for two adults, three kids (well, Josh and Samuel are more adult portion actually), Jonathan's dinner, and then 10 portions to freeze down for more meals for him. I assume that means people usually waste huge amounts as I can't believe it is because they eat all that much meat. If they do, well, no wonder obesity is rising. Having said that those of you who have met either Roarke or myself will know we don't exactly look like people who eat small portions so... like I said, it must just come down to waste.

Jonathan is currently sitting on the table next to me trying to get onto his push along train which is ALSO on the table... you can see where this is going to end can't you?! Yes I know he shouldn't be on the table but you try reasoning with him!